On the psychology of self-presentation and impression management — My mom doesn’t know me. Not really. For a long time, she only knew the role I played in her presence. That’s why she was so surprised when she started reading me online. “Who the fuggedy f*ck f*ck is this joke-cracking cartoonist with a penis fetish who’s impersonating my son?!”…

Make sure your audience matches you — Dear reader, are you sure you want to read this post? Because, you know, if you keep reading, there’s the very real risk that you may become part of my audience and I’m not sure I like that. You see, I’m not looking to build just any old audience. I’m…

It all starts with murdering a plant —

Success isn’t that easy — If you’ve spent any time among the “Hey! Let’s all get on our knees and worship success” crowd, you’ve probably heard about the 1% rule of improvement. It goes something like this: All you have to do to turn yourself into Mr. Succeed-a-Lot is improve by 1% every day. By…

Unscrupulous writers have it much easier —

Constantly comparing yourself to others kills your creativity — You’re a chicken. Yes, you. You may not lay eggs, but like every other chicken, you want to know where exactly within your flock you rank. You want to know your place within the pecking order. Sadly, whenever you look at the chicken leaderboard, you discover that you’re not the…